To God, Through Mary
Posted by Danielle Bean
in Faith
on Tuesday, July 29, 2008 1:10 PM
We spent the day yesterday at Goose Rocks Beach in Maine. I’ve got the sunburned neck, sand-filled van, and exhausted children to prove it. It was a tiring day, but as always, making the effort to get our gang to the ocean proved worthwhile.
On the way home, Dan and I decided to drive through Kennebunk in order to take the kids to the St. Anthony Franciscan Monastery that we used to visit back when we were dating.
The monastery has a guest house, but that didn’t interest us much. What did interest us were the dozens of walkways that wind their way through the lush, green woods, past statues of saints, outdoor grottos, and stations of the cross, toward the ocean.
Along the way we “met” St. Francis, St. Anthony, Our Lady of Fatima, Bl. Kateri Tekakwitha, and more. A particularly lovely spot was the Shrine of the Way of the Cross. Here, Daniel was quite taken with the stone steps. He’s a pious child, to be sure, but I don’t think the fact that they were engraved with the last words of Christ was the appeal here.
What thrilled him was the relative ease with which he could scale them. Fast. Over and over again, he raced up and down, very nearly giving me a heart attack. One misstep and I was sure we’d be heading to the Kennebunk ER, and I didn’t need our day trip to Maine to be that memorable.
Between baby grabs, I managed to take a good look at the altar. It was striking because it was absolutely covered with shells, sticks, medals, rosaries, stones, and handwritten notes that praying pilgrims had left behind.
One stone in particular caught my eye. Smooth and small, it rested in the farthest corner of the altar. On its surface, in felt tip marker, someone had inscribed a single word that gripped my heart: Baby.
I wondered who might have left this single word prayer. Someone who was hoping for a pregnancy or someone who was worried about a troubled pregnancy? Someone who lost her baby and was now hoping for healing and peace? Someone whose baby was grown and was in danger of going astray?
What struck me most about the entire scene was that these tiny tokens which covered the altar represented the hopes and wishes, dreams and pains of hundreds of passing strangers. We don’t know each other, but we share a common faith and a common hope that our petitions will be heard.
I don’t need to know what “Baby” means on this particular stone. God knows. The one who wrote it knows. And here we entrust it—along with all the other pieces of prayer—to Mary. Mary, who sees and feels our pain as only a mother can, collects them all, and looks down on us all. Lovingly.
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Filed under babies, mary, prayer
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Comments
1. Posted by Jacqueline Cinnante
[website] on Tuesday, Jul 29, 2008 2:47 PM (EST):
Dear Danielle,
I have been a big fan of your blogs and many inspirational reading books and articles.
What touched me the most is how beautiful you depicted the grotto near Mary. I am now pregnant with my 5th child, due in January 18, 2009, and I have been pregnant twice this year.
I lost a baby, Baby Love, on February 4th, 2008 at 12 weeks gestation. My husband and I got alot of controversy from our doctor for what we decided to do. We wanted the remains of our baby to be buried at a Catholic Cemetary. What we did apparently is unheard of in our culture.
As a Catholic family, we wanted our child to be baptized and named by our pastor. We had our baby buried at a local Catholic Cemetary. It was a beautiful ceremony. But what we found was the silly hurtful and painful comments the days during and after our loss. Our midwife and doctor at the time, said that at 12 weeks gestation, “It’s just a bunch of cells. It’s common and we should get over it.” Appalling to us and so very hurtful.
The looks and weird comments we got for doing something that was so near and very precious to our family and broken hearts gave us the strength to defend the honor of our baby and our beautiful Catholic Faith.
When I read your blog about the BABY note, it brought me to tears. I have left many love notes to my Baby Love, and I know that my angel baby has received all of them. How many times I have gone to the Cemetary to see little angels, seashells, photos, little poems, or petals of a flower on a baby’s grave site, and unsaid, you don’t feel so alone.
God bless you Danielle for your beautiful writings. Your talent and mothering motivate so many mothers like myself who aspire and who are wanting the same happiness and strong Catholic
faith and value in their lives.
God bless and may peace be with you always.
Jackie
2. Posted by annette on Tuesday, Jul 29, 2008 4:32 PM (EST):
Jackie,
I, too, have lost many babies at this gestational age. We have buried 5 of our children. One died at birth from prematurity, and I lost one at 19 weeks, and 3 at 14 weeks. We had funerals for the one that died at birth and the one lost at 19 weeks. The three at 14 weeks we had Catholic burials without the mass. I have lost 6 others at earlier stages in pregnancy that we did not have remains of. I plan on acknowledging them on a plaque at our grave site along with those that are buried there. I thought it was a tremendous blessing to deliver my babies and bury them. We held all of them, took pictures and did many other things that others might think are odd. But, they were our children, a gift from God and precious to us and Him. Danielle your story touched me as well. At every mass I offer my suffering to Christ and spiritually place all my babies, those that are alive with me and those that are more alive with Christ, on the altar for love of Him.
3. Posted by Jacqueline Cinnante
[website] on Tuesday, Jul 29, 2008 8:42 PM (EST):
Hi Annette,
God bless you and I will keep you and your babies in my prayers. I light a candle once a month at my church for my Baby Love and all the little ones up there with Jesus. There is a beautiful statue near the candles in church that have Jesus with 3 children sitting beside him. Jesus is depicted so beautifully, as I imagine Him with my baby and all the lost babies here on earth.
You are a courageous and strong woman of faith Annette. You are a testament to all women in our faith that believe in God to the fullest. I know many women in my life that would have stopped at 2 miscarriages or baby losses. I admire your strength and faith in God.
Again, may God bring peace to you in your suffering, and that through this forum or other mommy blogs, you may find some common ground or unity with other moms like myself that have gone through a similar experience. I know that I have. I don’t feel so alone when I hear similar stories or experiences of other moms.
May peace be with you. You are in my prayers.
internet hugs Jackie
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